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Robert Rabbin on the Trap of Romantic Fantasies

When you first meet someone special, it’s common to feel overwhelmed by your desire for them. It’s possible to fantasize a whole life with someone before we’ve ever even spoken to them! Often, our response to this attraction is, “This is the one!” But the problem with this type of desire is the possibility of being caught up in romantic fantasies.

According to Robert Rabbin, this kind of desire actually runs counter to love. Love makes no demands on a person, it only opens the door and invites them to come inside.

Robert Rabbin is the author of the audiobook The Sacred Hub: Living in the Shimmering Light of Your True Self. This audiobook is an inspiring collection of essays on meditation, self-inquiry, awareness, freedom, and more. It’s an uplifting guide through the process of questioning, reframing, and deepening awareness that will help you discover your own infinite nature–one of enduring happiness and peace.

What’s in this episode?

In this excerpt, Robert Rabbin discusses the beginning of a romantic relationship. When you begin to care for someone you might see them as the missing piece that will complete your own life. Robert points out that if we hope that another person will fill us with what we don’t already have, we are sowing the seeds of romantic fantasies that lead to attachment and dependency. He offers some enlightening and inspiring thoughts on the nature of true love.

Robert Rabbin began his professional journey in 1985, after spending 10 years living and working with meditation master Swami Muktananda. He developed an international reputation as a radically brilliant speaker and public speaking guru, as well as a distinguished self-awareness facilitator, leadership adviser, and personal mentor. He authored eight books and more than 250 articles on authentic living and public speaking, leadership, self-inquiry, spiritual activism, and meditation.

In January 2012, he was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer and told he had a few months to live. However, in keeping with his contrarian nature, he thrived well past the predicted use-by date. He passed away in December 2017.

Listen to our recent interivew with Robert Rabbin: Inner Wisdom and Clarity: A Conversation with Robert Rabbin